In a time of social drift, can we rediscover what it means to be a good neighbor?

Right after sharing the commandment to love the Lord with all your heart, Jesus tells his followers one more thing: Love your neighbor as yourself.

It seems like a simple enough concept. Yet if the studies and statistics are any indication, many of us barely know the names of our neighbors, much less what is happening in their lives.

Josh and Angela Wyatt are on a mission to change that. With a few pieces of scrap lumber and a recipe from Angela’s native Lebanon, the Wyatts have found a way to bring people together in their town near Lake Norman.

They’re in a group at First UMC Troutman taking part in the Good Neighbor Experiment, an initiative to foster community and belonging at a time when too many live in isolation. The Foundation brought the effort to Western North Carolina this year through the Reynolds Ministry Fund.

Churches form neighboring teams that meet for weekly mini-experiments, coaching and storytelling events to exchange ideas with other congregations.

From strangers to relationships

A mobile lemonade stand may not be exactly what Jesus had in mind. But the Wyatts and their church have discovered it can be the kind of place that puts people at ease.

“Sometimes it takes until the second or third cup,” Josh said. “That short conversation leads to something deeper, and people can start to see that you care. That’s the connection we have witnessed.”

Josh is a self-employed contractor who enjoys finding creative uses for lumber. Angela, a special education teacher, prizes the recipes that family members brought from their native region (the special ingredient is rose water). Once Josh hammered the boards in place, church members showed up with red and yellow paint – a color scheme to create a cheery vibe.

At a recent National Night Out event in a town park, the group set up camping chairs and brought along youth from the church to serve as volunteers. Twenty gallons of lemonade were served that night.

Rev. Jeff Hamrick, pastor of First UMC Troutman and the Troutman Cooperative Parish, said he’s been amazed by the reception.

“It’s helped them to start moving from stranger to acquaintance to a point where they actually build relationships,” Jeff said. “Not just knowing someone’s first name or the car they drive, but where they work and a passion they may have.”

Listening to our neighbors

Filling the pews on Sunday morning is not the aim. Instead, advocates use words like relationship, abundance and joy as measures of fruitfulness. At the heart are two questions: How well do you know the people who live around you? How would your life be different if you knew them better and could support one another?

“Disciple-making isn’t just about sharing our testimonies with people,” said Rev. Annalee Allen, the Foundation’s Director of Reynolds Ministries and Programs. “It also requires listening to our neighbors, hearing their fears and concerns, and walking with them.”

John Wesley described this kind of holy conversation as Christian Conferencing. In listening intently to one another, we will hear God speak as well.

The Good Neighbor Experiment originated in Wichita, where neighbors eager to live out their Christian faith began testing possibilities. Now called The Neighboring Movement, the group works nationwide to nurture a change in culture by connecting and mobilizing local assets.

Modeling the example of Christ

Since 2020, the landscape has shifted due to, well, a long list of factors. The lingering effects of COVID-19, coupled with political and racial tension, have affected how congregations extend the love of God in Jesus Christ, Rev. Beth Crissman writes in The Faithful Path for Now, a church study resource.

“The challenge is in knowing who our neighbors are, especially when the community around us changes,” Beth writes.

In 2023, the U.S. Surgeon General declared an epidemic of loneliness in the United States. The landmark finding said that a lack of social connection can increase the risk for premature death to levels comparable to smoking 15 cigarettes a day.

Even before COVID-19, about half of U.S. adults reported experiencing measurable levels of loneliness.

“In the last few decades, we’ve just lived through a dramatic pace of change,” Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy told NPR. “We move more, we change jobs more often, we are living with technology that has profoundly changed how we interact with each other and how we talk to each other.”

Seeking to be part of the solution, the Foundation teamed with Faith in Rural Communities, an arm of the NC Rural Center that empowers churches in parts of the state with limited resources. An initial cohort of five congregations is taking part.

“It’s not easy to go up to someone you’ve lived beside for years, waving as you each get in and out of your cars, and reintroduce yourself because you still can’t remember their name,” said Andrew Hudgins, program associate for Faith in Rural Communities.

A ministry of presence

To develop the kind of relationships that reflect the love and grace of God, we are called to be in ministry in our communities, instead of ministering “to” them.

Rev. Adam Barlow-Thompson, Executive Director of The Neighboring Movement and an elder in the Great Plains Conference, sees an opportunity to think beyond the church as a service provider or proselytizer.

“Churches that do best,” he said, “are ready to move from program-driven ministry to relationship-centered connections.”

It’s an approach that matches the vision of the late Royce Reynolds and his wife, Jane. The Greensboro couple established the Reynolds Ministry Fund to invest in projects that reach new people with God’s love.

Over the next five years, Faith in Rural Communities hopes to recruit 100 congregations to form neighboring teams.

Perhaps these groups can look to Troutman for inspiration. Eager to build on their momentum, church members plan to set up the lemonade stand in residential developments springing up where farmland used to be. An estimated 10,000 homes are planned or under construction in Troutman as Charlotte growth creeps northward, town officials estimate.

That’s a lot of lemonade. And a lot of hands for Josh Wyatt to shake.

“When you find a place you feel like you belong,” he said, “it breaks down the wall, and we can sit down and have a conversation. And it becomes a bridge for us to ask, ‘How can we serve?'”

This story, published Sept. 25, 2024, was reported and written by Director of Communications Matt Garfield. Photos are courtesy of First UMC Troutman.